Ok Facebook, well since you asked. What’s on my mind?

Let’s see.  My eyes are darting back and forth, scanning any thoughts I may have. I have my ear buds in, there is no outside noise. Tegan and Sara are singing Closer (Shepard and Sultan Remix) into my ears. 

I woke up a couple hours ago in excruciating pain…in my left knee, thanks to Osteoarthritis in it.  I have taken Tylenol (4) and rubbed Icy Hot on it. It’s slowly feeling better.  Having a conversation mentally with my cat, Shannon, we are blinking morse-cat code.

Next song…This Time by EverSay. Who you say? EverSay…pretty awesome band, right Blake Dawson?!!

Getting more excited for December 9th, not so much for the flying. Our tickets are purchased, seats picked, big 757 plane from Orlando to Newark, NJ and then an express flight on a Bombardier Q300 propeller plane continuing to Albany.  I need to get things out of my head on the return flight, being that I will be traveling alone…especially in Newark…on a United 757 plane.  That’s all I am going to say.  If you know the significance of plane and route. I will be watching you odd people, don’t mind the stares.

I will have my phone, and ear buds and a playlist of music.  Any passenger not my wife, who sit next to me on the 757, my shoulder is not your fucking pillow, you will get elbowed. And I will bluntly tell you so. As the song that is playing in my ears right now, I have “The Cure” for you if you invade my flying space.  You promise to not be an asshole, I promise not to eat bananas…unless you like the smell of them.

Hint…they make me fart……lol.💀

As I surprised my Mom in 2014, with a 70th birthday, by making the plans while here in Florida, and driving by myself to New York and back. I do hope there are no plans for a surprise 50th birthday while I am there….not everyday you turn a half century.  But still…

What’s on my mind?

Daylight savings time…go away. Hate that I am sitting here in the dark at 5:30pm, the sun is setting…no more are days where it’s light out at 9pm still. 

In This Moment is playing my song…Whore.  With the best lyrics ever…YOU LOVE ME FOR EVERYTHING YOU HATE ME FOR.

Lots of people experience that today. Loving and hating a person at the same time.  I HATE you because you’re gay but LOVE you because you’re my son.  You LOVE all there is about me, but HATE what I have become. The two words go hand in hand. You can’t have one without the other.  And sometimes LOVE is worse than HATE.  It’s easy to tell someone that you love them and truly mean it…many don’t even know what the word means. You can’t teach it. 

HATE is taught everyday. Differences distinguished by HATE.  I HATE you because your skin color is not like mine. That turban you wear on your head, I HATE it, take it off.  You believe in God, it’s a given that you HATE me, because I am not worthy.  I HATE your face, here let me rearrange it for you.  GOD HATES FAGS. Kids mad at their parents scream, I HATE YOU!!! Then run to their rooms and slam the door.  I HATE brussel sprouts.

LOVE. I LOVE cats. I LOVE my wife. I LOVE my family and friends. I LOVE music, video games, Reeses Peanut Butter candy. I LOVE that I have lost weight, but HATE the extra skin that I have acquired. 

We LOVE so much material things and not enough of one another, hence where it’s definitely easier to say you HATE someone but LOVE your iPhone. 

I HATE living in these apartments.  I am even getting tired of living period. Never have I seen so much shit as I see every time I turn on the tv….a boob tube filled with more HATE, against differences.  HATE filled aggression, instead of settling things like men, will pull out a gun and shoot you. Fighting over the last piece of chicken.  Parents leaving their child in hot cars. People in a fucking hurry to pass a school bus and run over kids waiting to board. Taking your eyes off the road to text a friend…be there so….as you run up under the bumper of the semi truck in front of you…was it worth your life? Murder. Death. Kill. Bullying and suicides. Kids killing kids.  # blacklivesmatter…not just yours.  ALL LIVES MATTER. Race wars setting us back to the civil rights movement of the 60s. Cops killing unarmed people.  Black on Black crimes.  Drugs.

Looking out your window and seeing police with high powered rifles because some black guy has a sawed off shotgun and has his roommate barricaded in their apartment. 

I didn’t think I had a lot on my mind….

There’s more….